Thursday, June 16, 2011

National Wiener Day Contest!

We have yet another contest going on here at Eat It, Miami, sponsored by National Deli for a chance to win a $10 Publix gift card, in honor of the resignation of Congressman Anthony Weiner, whose name should be pronounced "wine-er" according to its spelling, but here in America we pronounce things however we want, just 'cause. Think Dwyane (Dwane) Wade or Malivai (Ma-li-vi-a) Washington. Plaxico is pronounced "Plexico." It's usually black dudes who do that, but not in this case. The honorable gentleman from New York wishes us to pronounce it "wiener." So, wiener it is, and wiener it shall always be, since he totally set himself up for the easiest joke in the world to be made by late night television hosts across the country.
The "Wiener Day Contest" will be as follows:

1. Read all of this:

South Florida based, National Deli is now making it possible to enjoy the same premium hot dogs sold in stadiums and arenas across the country, at summer backyard [barbecues] and family gatherings.  The official sports area dogs are now available at Publix Super Markets throughout South Florida.
More than 200 Publix stores from Vero Beach to Miami are now carrying the locally made deli-style franks as well as their own line of all-natural Grade A mustard.  Both products are prepared to National Deli’s premium quality standards, giving customers an authentic deli experience without a premium price.

National Deli hot dogs are also the Official Hot Dog of the Hard Rock Live in Hollywood, Florida; the San Antonio Spurs; the Pittsburgh Pirates; the Denver Broncos; the Thomas & Mack Center at the University of Nevada, Las Vegas; Wet ‘N Wild Orlando; Roger Dean Stadium, home to Florida Marlins’ and St. Louis Cardinals’ spring training games; and in the most famous arena of all, New York City’s Madison Square Garden.

National Deli is the largest manufacturer of authentic premium deli meats in the country, and the largest supplier of deli meats to the world’s leading distributor. Known for its famous corned beef and pastrami, the company also offers a full line of premium quality meats, including 50 varieties of roast beef, several types of turkey breast, more than 100 different shapes and sizes of premium beef franks, and an extensive selection of prime rib and pot roast. National Deli’s mission is to provide superior customer service, consistent quality and innovative products that continue to appeal to their customer’s discerning palates.

2. Add us on twitter http://twitter.com/#!/EatItMiami

3. Do NOT send us a photo of your wiener. This step should be easy.

4. Tweet us the funniest expansion of an acronym that you can think of for WEINER or WIENER. An expansion is the spelled-out version of an acronym, like SCUBA's expansion would be "self-contained underwater breathing apparatus." Don't you just love your Eat It, Miami grammar lessons? So, here's an example: "When Everyone Is Naked Everyone Resigns." Or just post it in the comments section if you don't have a Twitter account and don't feel like setting one up. The "wiener" will win a $10 gift card for Publix so you can buy a pack of hot dogs and some buns.

Best. Blog. Ever.

3 comments:

richie said...

without internet, erections never ejaculate reliably.

Colin said...

Not bad, richie, not bad.

Colin said...

Congratulations, richie! You are the winningest Eat It, Miami fan in the history of Eat It, Miami.