Tuesday, January 26, 2010

Jaxson's Root Beer Redux

My good buddy, Nicky R, flew into Ft. Lauderdale from Beantown on Saturday, so I says to myself, I says, "we should swing by Dania Jai Alai and then grab a light snack at Jaxson's Ice Cream, just down the road.

Well, since I'm obviously a glutton and a buffoon, I decided that a root beer float would not be enough to sate my appetite, even though I felt as if I was going to die the last time I tried to finish one. Anyhoo, on top of the root beer floats we each ordered, Nick got a side of garlic fries, which I'm certain he can still taste, and I ordered some chili fries. I'm a sucker for chili fries.

Well, I might have had a chance at finishing my float, since I decided to consume as much of it as possible before the fries arrived, but lo and behold, the powers that be (Satan, obviously runs the place) decided that the root beer float, so large it is served in a pitcher, needs a side of root beer. I don't really know what else to say. Here's a photo (in which you can glimpse my freaky hitchhiker thumbs and snazzy new purple pin stripe shirt from Brooks Brothers. Purple is such a hot color these days. Also note the size of a "side" of fries at Jaxson's. Ha!) -


Thursday, January 7, 2010

Le Big Mac et Royal Cheese

Big Macs and Quarter Pounders are "buy one, get one for a penny" today. I think. I saw it somewhere and put it in my Blackberry and that thing would never lie to me. Would you, BB? No, you wouldn't. That's why I love you so. Please, never leave me.

I'm not quite sure why they don't just make them "buy one, get one free." Is it a legal thing? Maybe it's a way they can avoid getting berated for causing the obesity epidemic because people can't use their brains and exercise some self-control when they eat and 2-for-1 Big Macs is too tempting for a corpulent customer to pass up. Thanks, Morgan Spurlock or Sperlock, or whatever your name is. Thanks for the brilliant insight that eating McDonald's every meal is bad for you. Why doesn't someone do that with Kentucky Fried Chicken or Pizza Hut or Taco Bell or Dunkin Donuts...could it be that "Super Size Me" was a clever title? I'm sorry it worked and now he's (kind of a little bit) famous. Hey America, let's keep rewarding people for unnoteworthy (yes, that's a word) achievements by turning them into celebrities and paying them to host New Year's Eve parties and start their own clothing lines. Agreed? Super.

Here's that clip from Pulp Fiction -

Wednesday, January 6, 2010

Eat It - Salsa Fiesta, 2929 Biscayne Blvd, Miami, FL (305)400-8245

www.salsafiestagrill.com

Wow, Salsa Fiesta is probably the worst name you could give a (Mexican) restaurant. As Bart Simpson replied to Lisa after she said "a rose by any other name would still smell as sweet."-

"Not if they were called stink blossoms."

Plus, if you say it in English, it sounds ridiculous. Sauce Party. That's a pretty strange name for a restaurant.

The subtitle or description or whatever is "Urban Mexican Grill." Where did the restaurant originate, you'd like to know? Venezuela. Only the staff told me that it's described as a "Fresh Mexican Grill" in Chavez country. I guess that's probably like Fresho Mexicano Grillo in Spanish or something.

It's basically the same thing as Lime, but there's only one Miami/U.S. location so far. The food is good and the prices are very good. You can stuff yourself for about $10. Presentation is great. Service is quick and cheerful and the restaurant is spotless. Even the bathroom is nice and the restaurant's decor is kind of like a cool loft apartment. Perfect for the up and coming Biscayne corridor. The last time I went there were several gay couples there, so you know it's cool. Those guys are so hip.

Monday, January 4, 2010

FWO

That stands for "F--- Waxy O'Connor's."

This is a reader comment that I have decided to repost -

hello Colin

this is the anonymous :) my name is jessy
contact jesvinagre@hotmail.com
not anonymous anymore...lol.

the answer to your question is "no way they compensated me for anything ",i have the case in court right now .i asked the towing company guy if he thinks this is right and he said no and advice me to go back to the bar and tell the bar manager to advice costumers about a permit paper to be put on dashboard.i had no idea of this paper cause is not posted anywhere in the bar and nobody told me either.also and most important they have signs all over the parking lot saying you can park up to 6 pm ...BUT IT IS A LIE ....they make more then 8 000 dollars a month towing cars. also be careful cause the towing company will put the wrong address on the receipt ,the scam is they illegally tow your car and write the wrong address so people like me have to prove the car was really parked there.

my case is in court right now.on the pre-trial they offer me and the manager mediation(we did not accept so we are going to trial) and the judge that heard my side already asked manager "Why would they have signs (parking for waxys from 8 am to 6 pm)on the parking lot . she sounded like she was on my side but now they saying my car was parked someplace else ,i cant believe they would actually get away with that lie...but we will see soon .

it will probably help if i get some signatures of people that had this happening to them ...

so if this happened to anyone please contact me at jesvinagre@hotmail.com