Friday, May 8, 2009

Don't Eat It - Anokha, 3324 Virginia St., Coconut Grove, FL 786-552-1030

Oh man, I feel bad saying this, but Anokha is just not very good. I guess if I'm going to be a food critic then I have to be tough on people sometimes, but my heart breaks when I see a business failing and it's hard for me to attack when I haven't been personally insulted.

That is why I love to hate Barton G, a restaurant about which I cannot publicly state my true feelings lest I be slapped with a libel suit (it's "libel" when it's written and "slander" when spoken). As casual as a blog is, you should really be careful about what you write. Anyway, in case you forgot, I hate that place, and the reason is that the staff there went out of its way to make my friends' and my experience there unbearable.

Moving along. Anokha used to be located in a smaller space (though I never ate there) and they've moved off the beaten path in the Grove to a side street. Even though there were probably 6 or 7 tables of people at the restaurant, it seemed empty. It was probably only 1/3 full, I would estimate. There was no hostess and only one waitress who informed us that the wait for main courses would be about 45 minutes. She was harried, understandably, but this made the dining experience less pleasant. One should not feel stressed by the waitstaff when paying for a meal.

They were out of a bunch of stuff, but it wasn't a big deal. We ordered samosas (Indian crab rangoon type appetizers) and some duck egg roll things that didn't taste Indian at all and came with a dipping sauce that did not match the food at all. It was like cocktail sauce with extra ketchup, I think. Wery, wery bad.

Main courses were the unadventurous (though I cannot help but to order them) chicken tikka masala and lamb vindaloo. The chicken was not tikka masala. It was thin chunks (sounds oxymoronic, I know) of chicken with some red sauce. Not creamy and savory like masala. It was dark red. It just wasn't right. The lamb was overly seasoned, in my opinion. The saving grace was the naan. It comes in a bunch of varieties. Raisin and others and it was quite good. The waitress gave us one free, which was a nice gesture considering the wait and lack of certain menu items.

The total, with one glass of wine each, for three was about 120 bucks. That's not bad. The food and atmosphere were just not good and the place seems to be managed poorly, I hate to say it. I wouldn't go back.

I guess I never wrote up a review for Guru on South Beach. Maybe I ate there before I started Eat It, Miami. Anyway, I remember having a wonderful time there and enjoying the food thoroughly. I think I'll go there next time I'm craving Indian and review it then.


Rocco said...

Who cares man, Anokha is closed down. What's the point of the article? The food that was?

C.L.J. said...

Of course, the fact that it was one of their last nights probably contributed to the quality of the food. They used to be very good, but their move was ill-timed and did them in.

Colin said...

I guess we ate there on its last night. Weird. I thought it was strange when the waitress/hostess looked at her watch when we arrived at 9. That suggested we were getting there kind of late, which is preposterous in Miami. There was no mention that it was closing down and my fellow diners and I had no idea. Surprising, but it explains a lot. I guess we were the last people to eat there since we were the last to leave on Thursday night. Rocco, you sound cranky.